Wednesday, 20 September 2017

My mama's visit

Last two weeks were busy. As you know Egg started preschool and my mother came to visit. 
And of course nothing is easy with us... she was meant to get here on Wednesday so I got the phone all at 4am Wednesday morning asking how far was Gatwick from Cardiff. Yes at 4am. And yes this sort of question. 
Turns out her plane was delayed by 10hours... 
And when she got here on Thursday she didn't ring to say what time she would arrive to Cardiff. Damn I was worried. Even called my step dad but reassured me saying it's probably her phone... and you know it was. 



We had lots of fun!
We went to street food festival, Egg wasn't a fan at 1st but did enjoy playing with all the fun tuktuks 



It's a great place to take your family and friends and even grouchy kiddies. Even in the rain. It is still here for his weekend so if you haven't been go eat something fun and sit in a cool disused transport.
We been to the pool twice, drunk beer, shopped pretty much till we dropped and mum did kick us out for dinner just the husband and me...



We went to a fancy restaurant but about this next time. 
We also spend time cooking eating and wine drinking. And we walked... a lot! Considering she used to run marathons she was so tired at 1st. But think I got her into a walking mood. She did ask for me to count up the kilometres we walked in these two weeks. 
It was super nice to have her here. She seemed rested, even if she did insist on doing stuff. And we didn't have a massive argument, everyone is amazed! 
She is safely home already. And I got to say I miss her already! 

Sunday, 17 September 2017

Pre-school

I might have been a bit quiet lately. Not only because my mother is visiting at the moment but also because my little munchkin started pre-school. 
And we survived... just about.
I just still cannot quiet believe that he is already starting school, he is actually one of the youngest kids there. But not the smallest! 
We started two days with half of our class for two days and then from this Wednesday with all the kids. 
Well Egg being Egg was ever so upset for three days and now he goes in and seems happy.
 


On the day one school had to call me to say that the child settled and now playing outside. But he was still looking for the way out of the school. Actually made them get another gate for the door to the "big" school. And this Friday when I dropped him off he still didn't want to wear shoes but he walked in and let go of my hand. And when we came back to pick him up he was sitting munching on the pineapple and wasn't interested in leaving. 



But the school of course brought up the fact that he doesn't listen and doesn't really talk. However there has been a little update on that front. He is making more words or at least attempting them and we got another audiology (hearing doctors) appointment. 
But school school is great. And I think will need to take Welsh too! 
I also cannot wait for him to make friends and me meeting other parents! 

Saturday, 2 September 2017

There is no such thing as a Gruffalo!

About a year ago my mother in law got us tickets to see Gruffalo on stage in New Theatre in the end of summer. We pretty much been waiting for this for about a year. Well I was.
All the recent cinema visits were disastrous when we had to leave after about 20 mins of the start of the film. I was very worried. 
Also the pushy box office lady sold us tickets right in the front and in the middle... this didn't help my anxiety about out first theatrical visit.
Also my little cutie pie was a really difficult all week... maybe he is that threenager stage when it's only his way or no other way. But he doesn't talk so this resolves in massive tantrums. 



When I saw the flocks of children all different ages I have relaxed. My demon baby won't cry first. 
But he had a major melt down when his pram been folded and taken away. 
Then he didn't want to take his sit. But followed me anyway. Note to all the parents bring snacks, sweets and raisins kept him busy while he was trying to figure out that the play was actually fun and interesting. 
Well the Gruffalo is a great show. Egg was interested, he was looking on stage with excitement. I think he understood and even roared at the roary bit when we were scaring the fox. I laughed loudly too so did my mother in law. Everything was good. But bully the end he got a bit fed up and accidentally banged his head on the armrest. Poor monkey was really upset. 
Leaving the theatre there was of course a big queue but some one wasn't happy. I had to drag him into the corner and leave him to tantrum. It was bad. I felt bad. It was so publicly but it was the best thing I could do. I couldn't leave and he wouldn't calm down. One lady offered to call for help, another said she would take him. We have a little chat about the drama and how much we enjoyed the show. And then he came down. 
I guess the people who offered help either thought he is different, and that I looked young and stressed I guess. But the concern was generally coming from kind place and I didn't feel judged... 
but all and all it was a very nice experience and good things definitely outweighed the bad. 


(Angelic appearances are deceiving)

But he threw 2 more bigs ones.
He wanted to walk in different direction than me and almost run out on the road. So I had to grab him and put him in the pram and tell him off. 
I seem to do a lot of this at the moment. Just keep saying that I am the boss not him and listening to him being annoyed and cry. 
My arms muscles hurt from wresting with this threenager but I can win this. I know. I just need sleep. 

Monday, 28 August 2017

Bank holiday. Hot day.

This last bank holiday treated us with some glorious sun and clear sky. And sleeping if you are a toddler is super hard. It's just warm.
Also I really didn't want to do anything so naturally I packed up the swimming stuff we had in the house, bikini for me and trunks for the child (our regular more suitable for pool adventure stuff was at my in laws) along with water wings we heard out for about 40 mins hike to the pool. 
So I naively thought we will be there right after opening time so it should be crowed and surly people would rather go the beach or something. Well we were greeted by this... 


  
I wanted to run back home and hide. But I thought I shall not be defeated by this and to be fair the queue moved really quickly. Must be some technical difficulty, or something along these lines. 
And pool was fun. Although kid tired to climb all over jacuzzi bit and were whistled at, and he is really strong willed yet totally lost without me. I put him on top the silde telling him I will meet him on the bottom he didn't hear and looked a bit lost... but all is well.
Then he had a cheeky meatballs in Ikea while I had a salad and admired his apetite after an hour long swimming. And of course took some photos 


All was going well and after a nap we went around the block for a scoot 



Well note to self. A tired child who was up early and after the pool will get hot and bothered rather quickly after scooting on the hot afternoon. Some people enjoyed the look of a super mum with a three year old on her shoulders holding legs with one arm while carting a scooter with another. 

All these things seem like a nightmare on the bank holiday. I think they would have been if I didn't have a child to entertain. We were active, we had fun, he had a tantrum or two but so did other kids with their parents. It was busy but I don't care, child and I had fun and that's the most important thing. 

Saturday, 26 August 2017

Too much of the good thing

Well it was too good... just too good..
For about a month the little one sleeps through the night and if he does wake up then only for a second. 
And he wakes up about 6.30am and sometime even 7.30... and few days ago he got up at 8.30am! 
I thought we conquered the sleep thing... or did we?



On Friday we went for a long walk in the Bute Park. But we didn't take a usual route we went by the river, there is small foot path there. So Egg could just run ahead of us and be actually totally safe, no bikes around.  



Here he is looking for big stones. 
We got home a bit later then dinner time and pretty much since 5pm until bath at 6.30pm he didn't stop eating and grazing. 
And the next day he was up at 5am... and was up a lot at night. We got him over tired and over fed. 
I thought it was a one off. I hope it's one off. 
Today he woke up at 5min to 5. This is progress right? 
But I am exhausted. There is always so much to do when you are stay at home parent. Even if I went to bed around 10 last night. Yeah I am this rock'n'roll Saturday night I was in bed at 10pm
So what we have learnt. I need sleep! Don't overtire and overfeed your kid before bed.  

Monday, 21 August 2017

Relationship with body and with running!

I am a lazy person. If I do not feel like going running I won't. I sort of wish I was more well committed to running! But it is also comes with the fact that I don't actually have time, not really. Hubby works silly hours to keep me at home before Egg goes to school. When little one is in nursery I either catch up on house work or I am studying. Sometimes I am so busy that I do not get to sit down till like 9pm and then ideally I need to be in bed around 10pm because the kid will be awake early ... so I give myself a permission to be lazy... also I am taking a year off races. I blogged about this before but it is something I still struggle with. And not only that... I feel a bit guilty that I don't run. 
In a way I guess I gave myself a permission to be lazy. 
But and here is a bit but... I guess. I like me better when I was a bit leaner. Not necessarily thinner but leaner more tonned. 


(Big cheeks and very big hair)

I haven't been light thin since I was 15 and I am
Ok with it. I am also ok with my changed body after having Egg. I do miss sometimes going braless. And I am ok that I am more of the size 12 now. It's ok to gain weight and ok not to be the same, and I am happy with my body. I grew a human I can walk with no trouble for over 10k daily, my body is amazing! 

I was meant to go for a run with a friend but she had to cancel I actually felt a bit disappointed that we can't go for a run but I didn't go by my self... I did some cooking and tidy a bit. 
It feel like I have not only taking a year off races but year off running and this isn't my aim. 
And also just last week I have listened to Scummy Mummies talking to Ruth Field who wrote Run fat bitch run. She said that running is just really good for you, which is true especially now that I am in my thirties, and that it is easiest and cheapest exercise there is. Like I didn't know it before. But having some one else saying it, it made me sad I gave up on it. So here it goes at next available moment I shall go out a run! 

Wednesday, 16 August 2017

Growing up

One of my friends from high school posted this picture on Facebook


It says "Friends are like stars. You don't see them all the time but they are here" and it's a great sentiment and became really true for me since becoming a mother. I think my friends Marzena and Eva would agree. We all used to work together and had great relationships but since they had their boys we barely see each other. Also the fact that they don't reside in Cardiff but are in smaller towns in South Wales. And I am jealous of their sea views!
Last week very inexpected I got a message from my university friend Lindsey who I haven't seen in years. 
So we met up had a good chat and a coffee. Sadly she lives all the way in Tenby. Once again jealous of the sea views... it was so nice to see her even if only for few hours. 



We both are mothers now and share the same struggles with lack of sleep. Even if we haven't been talking we still have common interests, like making random foods like kimchi and kefir (well I get mine from Continental shops), like raising boys, books we don't have time to read. 
However when I am random pottering around and going back to study she started her own business. So big shout out to The Wildflower Nursery! 

Sunday, 13 August 2017

From free range toddler.. little wins

Raising humans is hard. I guess I never thought it would be easy but I didn't expect my kid to have such strong will and be so vocal about having stuff his own way... yes the same kid that doesn't talk.
Besides trying to get him to talk we also trying to "break" modify his behaviour. And of course he is at his worst with me. Typical. 


 
Basically I had to always give in to avoid the meltdown. It's easier. Yeah sure my world revolves around him, but I should not be bullied by a three old who thinks running around the trousers around the ankles is so fun and so great! 
Now I tell him no. Or I explain why I do not think jumping into the wall is not safe. It usually resolves in a end of the world yell but he does as I tell him. And more often now he complies without much argument. 
Like last week I was super pleased that he was helping me at launderette without much grouching and getting into trouble. And he didn't want to be these he would just sit in the pram. 
I also can tolerate him yelling, not crying, for much longer. This also means that I can actually do some stuff and don't need to wait for him to be asleep. It's a nice change. 
It's little wins every day. No matter how long. I'm in this war for a long term. 
Just must remember that I am doing it for his own good and my future sanity. I am not very sane now but it will go back I hope. Hubby also hopes to get me back. Apparently I am different since having Egg. But this story is for another day. 

Life with no washing machine. Rant!

I understand that the thing I am about to rant is a privilege and I really have no right to... but I am super annoyed and well, hope you will learn from my mistake. 

Two and a half weeks ago as I was putting Edgar to bed my washing machine started making this rattle noise that I had to abandon reading Gruffalo and run downstairs... the washing machine drum had pretty much fallen out. 
"Damn", I though! This will cost as much to repair as getting a new one. And we have had it with the house when we bought it... so t was used and actually older model really... 
Only once we didn't have a washing machine, when we loved him Bath. But there was a launderette pretty much next door... and when we had to buy one we went wth Argos, that was on the next street when we lived in Birmingham. 
Hubby convinced me to get a washer dryer in one. I won't dry stuff all the time but sure it will be helpful. And once again I went with Argos.



After the massive disaster with the online payment when my card been charged twice and I had no order number... yes that actually happened. Two phone calls, one to Argos (the lady on the otter side was very apologetic and explained that the money will be retired to me but she couldn't give me any time and frankly wasn't sure why this happened but it did happend before) and to my bank who informed me that matter been resolved and the funds been returned. Thank you bank! I went to the Argos shop. ("Next time use A.O. 2 day delivery," said a helpful memener of staff in my school)... Machine I actually wanted wasn't available but my second choice was there. Lady on the till explained that with in 5 days I will be getting a phone call and 2 hours prior to delivery too. So at latest by next Monday I would be able to wash stuff and not have mount of washing... 
Yeah right! I got a text informing me about the delivery being in 2 weeks time... 
Not a happy bunny I called and asked why. "Oh it was pushed back" why?! They weren't sure. Perhaps it wa s that the item wasn't available... so if this is the case why couldn't I get my 1st choice then... 
At this point I wished I've cancelled my order and looked else where. But I thought I will give them a call back. I have been in touch with Tesco who was much more helpful on the phone and explained the delivery to me. Well it would be the same time. It wasn't worth a hassle.... 
But the milkaholic like to get nuddy in the night and wee in the bed... I need to wash things. We do have enough clothes to last us but not with Egg's bedding. 
Thank you my friend Viera who picked up a load and dropped if back off with me in 2,5 hours. 
And I have been to my local launderette. Peace and quiet all by myself. But yesterday I had to take little one with me. He charmed them all there. But it was difficult. And over this time I have spend anot £50 just on doing laundry... and I have paid for my washing machine... this makes me so mad! 
One good thing, I now I know my neibouhood a bit better. One of the ladies working in the launderette lives around the corner from us. And another lady told me that she has a grand daughter how old she was etc... and she was really praising my little one which we both loved and were ever so grateful. 

Thank you Argos for being so unhelpful! Wasting my money and my rate free time!  And I shall not use your home delivery ever again! 

Saturday, 5 August 2017

(Not) talking Wonder

Edgar is almost 3! 
I cannot believe this, it like it was just yesterday I was waddling around with a massive bump thinking of what to name my little egg...
And he doesn't talk....
When Egg was about 18 months old he used to sing Twinkle Twinkle and so a little star with his hands. He used to call us mama and dada and call all small animals bunny. Well my mother's cats were bunnies. 



And now he doesn't say much. Only bird language. Lots of different noises. Sometimes he would say a word or even two and then won't say them again... 
I am pretty convinced that he is just stubborn. We know voice and words are there. He just can manipulate us to get his own way.... 
But then we also have all these medical professionals around us. We saw speech and language therapist (SLT), paediatrician and regular visits to our health visitor (HV)... I really didn't find SLT helpful she produced a terrible report based on her observations. Well if she was observing my child for 2 hours she would have noticed that he isn't wearing nappies and wouldn't tell me about how he "didn't ask to be changed"... so I am not convinced and not a fan. Paediatrician thought Egg was brilliant but couldn't see anything so referred us to one who specialises in development. 
We are also waiting for audiology appointment later this month and neurodevelopment too. 
With the HV we are trying to modify Edgar's behaviour... he is spirited and like his own way is the only way. This is actually works... he listens and is calmer.... 

But all this is so stressful. However, I am optimistic and positive that he is just stubborn... 

Well in any outcome... my boy is amazing.

So for all the mamas and papas out there who are struggling with the same or similar issue, it will be better and stay positive and have faith in your kids abilities. 

Tuesday, 1 August 2017

Taking a year off...

Ever since I have discovered I can run I was doing races pretty much every summer. Exception was when we have moved away from Cardiff but even then I still did Surivial of the Fittest in 2013 and Birmingham half the same year. 
Admittedly since Edgar came into our lives I exercise less even ... not at all... I still managed few races and even got the dream time of 10k in 58min. 



Yeah it's a great time for some one who doesn't really take running seriously! 

But this year I felt the pressure to go running. The pressure to do the races. And I didn't feel happy about it. So I maybe run once this year by my self and once with the club. But as for races... I am taking a year off. 
I wouldn't say I am out of shape. We still walk a lot. Thank you Fitbit for keeping me on track. But races are complicated. I need to sign up on time and with enough time to train. Also I want to do as many as I can and can afford. Yes these things cost money. Not much but it all adds up. Also usually races are on Sundays so I need a sitter. And not many people can and will... if before it was just the matter to scoff down some bagels with peanut butter and banana, pin the race bib on and do the race now it is more complicated... I need to arrange very much in advance and I need to work to have disposable income. But mainly a mate to watch Egg. 
So since I have not run much but I still feel the bug I responsibly taking a year off. This won't be enjoyable running, besides toddler needs me still and I need to not stress about running... I have enough stress as it is. 

Monday, 24 July 2017

Fighting with my milkaholic

My almost 3 year old has a terrible milk habit. When i hear other parents saying how they had a bad night their kid woke up once I want to cry and tell them they don't know how lucky they are! Truly! 
For last three years I can count on one hand how many times Egg slept throw the night. It was 3 times. Three glorous nights... 
So every time he would grouch in the night we would give him a bottle with milk. Yes we are bad. And he still has bottles. Yes yes I know.
So after having a nice chat with Health Visitor last week, she said he needs a uninterrupted sleep, and so do we. It is linked to their development and you know... it's a sleep!! 
Basically we had to suck it up and not give him milk. And guess what two difficult nights and now he pretty much sleeps throw until he wakes up. 


(Here is my tiny terror with his new love Welsh cake)

Win! 
But last few days he was up at 4am and 4.30am and refused to go back to sleep... and he gets naked... with all the wet consequences...
However today he cried out at 2am I went to check on him, dressed him and fixed the bed as much as I could without disturbing him much. I put a pair of boxers over this pull up nappy... he got up at after 5am. 
This makes me wonder what would happen if I get him into nappy and pants, or dressed him in a night before he wakes up... and would we wake up at 6am in two days time?
Also since we cut the milk consumption and I recycled most of his bottles he rather happily drink out of a mug. It also results in cutest milk mustashe!
And also did I mention he uses the toilet and only wears nappy at night time... or you know not really. We can't manage a number 2 while wearing big boy pants just yet but it's a win none the less!

Little victories count! Every single one of them. I am slowly tacking this toddler thing and slowly becoming more of myself... not just Edgar's mama. 


Saturday, 22 July 2017

System behind the madness. Blog content.

Few days ago I finally got to play with this blog on laptop rather then iPad or a phone... 
and it made me wonder why do I keep doing it and why don't I have a proper little theme to it... you know these blogs that only have one purpose and one subject to it... 


 
I suppose it is always been my trouble. I am just into many many things. 
Making, running, shopping, cooking, eating, drinking, cinema, reading... but now I look at this list and really don't think I do this much of any of this. Now I am mainly mumming. 
But surly it is not a bad thing to have many little passions and interests... 
Well the Mininmalists (I mentioned them in previous post here) would say that you need to pick one passion and cultivate it for a bit then get another one...  I don't know if I can do it. Ever. 
Especially since becoming a mama... a stay at home for now mama. (I understand that not everyone can become parents or be stay at home ones.... but sometimes I feel like I lost in piles of washing, nursery rhymes and activities that should make my boy more developed and amazing like a unicorn!)
But I digress... 

I just want to be able to do stuff that I used to before I became a parent... but in the end of the day I just want to sit down and veg out in front of tv with a glass of wine... 



I guess we all change. And we change more dramatically once we become parents. 
So what I am staying is people are always changing. Change is good. 
I started blogging about one thing but I am not the same person as I was in 2010. But as for having several things to be passionate about I think it is also cool, just tackle one at the time. And I hope it make for an interesting and fun read! 

Tuesday, 18 July 2017

And the internet goes mad

So new doctor who is Jodie Whittaker and the internet went mad... a woman doctor what?!


I enjoyed the new Doctor and the Christmas specials and all the fun and sometimes scary and unexpected twists and turns. And frankly I didn't think much about who is going to be a new doctor. Until I was listening to Scummy Mummies podcast and when Helen Thorn's daughter said wouldn't it be nice if next doctor would be a girl... like a little light bulb went off in my head, yeah really why can't it be a woman. 
 12th doctor was so much fun, thank you Peter Capaldi! And the new companion Pearl Mackie's character Bill was gay. Honestly the episode with Romans and discussion about sexuality made me chuckle and it was just so as a matter to fact! Also very sad to see her leave the show. I loved Bill...

The show is about kindness, bravery and love. Doctor is always trying to help everyone! 
But all this not only just a great show it also shows kids that it's all good qualities and being different is ok and even cool... 
So when doctor regenerates doctor can be anything. And even maybe with tentacles. Pretty sure one of the doctors actually says so after the regeneration. So why can't the doctor be a woman?!

Yes BBC did a big announcement of this. And it is a bit deal. It's an important show and for the 1st time in Dr Who history, 50 years, Doctor is a woman. I guess they also anticipated the reaction....
What annoys me is that some of these haters don't even watch the show... or supporters of the choice of actor say that they will actually watch the show. I say no your opinions are not valid here you don't watch it and probably never will.


It is most certainly NOT political correctness gone mad. The show needed a new actor the show got the new actor. And yes this might inspire bunch of young girls and tell them that they can be anything. Just like bunch of young girls growing up now and in the 80s thinking that having a female prime minister is totally normal (politics aside it is just representation).

If she can see it she can be it!

But what about the boys you say? Well from the beginning the Doctor was a remarkable number of wonderful male actors, wouldn't you agree?
Personally I am more sad about  Steven Moffat has left the show too... I truly loved the episodes that he did.... 
But it is going to be fun, new Doctor, new writers, new companion! 
Super exciting change is upon us can we just be happy and look forward to new season?




Saturday, 15 July 2017

Food festival with toddler

I love summer time festivals in Cardiff. Used to look forward when tourist information office would dropped off the booklets for summer festivals in the city.
And my favourite by far is the food festivals in the bay. Last year we were really lucky to go on he day when Welsh football team were coming home. Town was super busy and t was nice a peaceful in the bay. So baring this in mind I have decided to pick up my mother in law and the child and we went down on Friday afternoon. 
But the child decided not to nap.. I hate when he refuses to nap. He was tired and grumpy... and very loud in his complaint about the situation he had created him self... 
We couldn't stay at any stalls for too long, or one of us would nose around while the other would push the pram around. 
We gave in in the end. He was happy running about and jumping off things but then wanted to be carried around. Damn this child is thin but sooo heavy! 





Pretty much only time he was happy was when he mounted the snow dog. 
But I sill managed to get few bits and bobs, like wonderful homemade natural cordials (had some with prosecco already) and a lovely pie from Wessex Pantry. And I don't even like pies! But these guys make excellent pies!

So I would definitely recommend to go and sample and buy and eat and drink and have a dance down the bay this weekend! 

Thursday, 13 July 2017

Quiet time

Mama's life is hard and it's very hard to find quiet time. I miss just sitting down and maybe crafting or just chilling, or having friends over or just a bath... 
Now with Big Guy all these things need to planning ahead. Yes I have to plan time in the bath. It's this intense. But I do get some quiet time every so often, when Edgar naps... I listen to podcast.



Yes my regular favourites like Kermode and Mayo, No Such Thing as the Fish, Answer me this and Scummy Mummies. 
But I have discovered the new ones recently and I want you to have a have a listen to... so here it goes.
The Guity Feminist 
They explore out noble goals in achieving equality for all while being super funny and yet super unsightful. This week they were talking about raising feminist boys which is a topic close to my heart. And if only I could get my hubby to give a go too... 
Then the creator of GF created Global Pillage. I always laught out loud to the silliness and enginiousnes of the comedians at this panel show. Yes it's a thing! Put Deborah Francis-White on TV I say!
Then of course from Answer me this Helen does the Allusionist. The fascinating things about the English language with the jokes thrown in. I guess I am also a fan of Helen's style of podcasting. 
So Allusionist had introduced me to Imaginary Worlds. Maybe I'm not interested in every subject Eric Molinski talks about but I am facinated by all and learnt so much. The episode Imagining Wonder Woman and about Slave Leia 2016 really stuck with me, and of course A Year Without Summer about Mary Shelly. 
I also just started to listen to Dirty Mother Pukker but Mother Pukker and At Home with... 
The DMP I enjoy because they discuss these things that are closed to me as a "people who happened to be parents" so I am not just a mama I am a person who happens to be a mama. Also their choice of words just makes me giggle like "bonking with intent" ... in tears! 
As for At Home with... well it's just nice that two ladies speak to other ladies they are really admire. It make for a nice listen. Even if I want it to be more of a visual thing, like a TV show. Oh prehaps it is the their starting point. But I got to say ladies they have spoken to are truly remarkable and interesting. 
And one more ... however this podcast is anything but about Frasier. Yes, it is the Talk Salad and Scrambled Eggs by Kevin Smith and Matt Mira. They talk so much and some of it is actually funny or even enlightening about the TV series in general but when they have actual guest who were involved with show. 

So yeah I spend my time passively learning about stuff I guess. May it be people's options on parenting or actual random bits about the language and fun facts around the world. 
And of couse you can find these on iTunes or similar outlets! And so let me know what you are listening in your free time. 

Cleansing. Product review

I am blessed or cursed with oily skin. 
Generally speaking it is good and has lots of collagen which means sings of ages are not as visible and will be delayed in general but this also means that I often have a shiny face and prone to blemishes and such.... 
So with that in mind I wanted to change my regular Boots botanicals cleanser for something less oily. But I wanted to continue that hot cloth routine and I don't want to spend a lot of money. So I got this from Superdrug under £5



And here is my big shiny and tanned face. 



The cleanser has a nice texture and spreads lovely on. Washes off easily living the skin feeling clean. But for the first week I was using it I had to apply moisturiser pretty much straight after my skin felt dry and like there was no water left on earth! But now it is better I guess it adapted. Also fave didn't feel oily which is nice for summer time. 
I am not sure if I'll get it again... pros are great but that feeling of dryness... and do not, I repleat do not used the cloth that comes with the product it so so rough on the skin! 
So texture is great, but some affects that are actually gone now are not so much. 
So undecided! 
But love their anti animal testing policies! 

Saturday, 8 July 2017

Major downs and ups this week

It was the best of times it was the worst of times... oh wait! So here is what happened this week. 
On Tuesday in a very silly way by keeping my Mulberry purse in the pram basket I lost it. Or it was stolen. 
Yes it's the purse hubby gave me for my bday last year and I love it deeply and I have some cash in it... well there was also my resident permit in it. And this means I cannot leave the country until I have a replacement. 
So we had to cancel our trip to motherland end of this month. Damn. 
Everyone is upset, apart from maybe toddler since he didn't really know what is going on. 

But then on Friday we had an adventure in Doctor Who experience and saw Spider-Man: homecoming. 



Got to tell you if you haven't been to Dr Who in Cardiff do visit. It's fun! And don't forget it is closing end of summer. As for Spider-Man well he is my new favourite marvel superhero! 

But my streak of trouble isn't over. This morning I was trying to fix my laptop... and I dropped it. So yeah I have the worst track record with laptops they just die on me like flies... 

Hope Sunday will be a fun day! And tomorrow it's hubby's birthday! Hooray! 

Sunday, 25 June 2017

My new plant baby

Plants are great! They pretty they produce oxygen and just make house feel like a home. However nothing compares to growing a plant from a seed or a just a small cutting. 
I guess you have seen a lot of people growing avocados from the pit. It loooks fun and super satisfying. It is a super poprular thing to do they even growing an avacoado in Big Bang Theory.
So I have been trying to grow one like well for about 6-9 months now. My previous attempt been dug out from the pot by little man. Naughty child! 
But I persevered... 

 
 
It was super easy just required a lot of patience. The how to's seems to be all in favour of sticking toothpicks into the pit and letting it sort of float above the water... well I don't have any or ever had them in the house so I just stick the pits into the espresso cups. Once the roots got long enough I moved the pit into this cute vintage milk bottle 


These are now my cutting and growing stuff in bottles. 
And just keep changing water and topping it up. The pits are super hungry. 
I planted mine when the little leaves have appeared. 
They are now twice the size and I have 2 more pits about to sprout roots on the kitchen windowsill. 

 

Now this unusual looking plant sits on the light living room windowsill.
Give it a try it's really easy! 

Monday, 12 June 2017

Wonderful Wonder Woman!

I love a good superhero movie. Yes a lot of them are damn similar and but they do entertain and such. And this is point of cinema, provide escapism, entertainment and hopefully send a good message. 
I am not much for DC universe, these films take them selves so damn seriously. Oh Man of Steel, Batman vs Superman (BVS:DOJ as no one calling it), I guess Sucide Squad was better of all them but still not without fault.... so to be perfectly honest I did not have much hope for Wonder Woman. But trailers look good, I didn't see much of them but it was... well there was something captivating about the teasers. 

 
I was actually rather excited and would love to see WW on opening night but it didn't happen. Also I have listened to interview with Gal Gadot on Kermod and Mayo film podcast (whittertainment) and it made me happy. But then they read out some of the listeners review and the opinions were very split! From glorious  praise to calling it anti feminist. I am with the delighted guys and gals!
SPOILERS Further ahead

It is super nice the rare female superhero take lead for a change even if with couple of men at her side. She all about love and humanity. Such a refreshing notion really. 

 

It was nice to the amazon island and get a peek into their history and origins. It was nice to see bad ass women just being strong. And the scene with the shilled on the island! Oh my goodness! 
Also it was super nice to see actresses who weren't in their 20s to take centre stage... so this Carrie Fisher popped into my mind when she asked if everyone can see her since women after certain age are invisible in Hollywood. 
I personally don't see WW as a super pro feminist film. It is a very good super hero film who happened to be a woman. And it is a refreshing change. It is also the 1st film of this kind to have a female director. And this is great to. And in my option it is the most successful one from all the DC franchise. So let us women do more! 

 

One of the negative comments was that she have fallen in love with the 1st man she saw... umm wouldn't you fall in love with Chris Pine with his "above average" well everything?! Looks like he played a massive role in introducing Diana into the real world and he did a great job! 
And then some one else said that she could only fight and defeat the big bad because of super sad thing that happens and involve the man she loves... well she didn't experience any of these emotions before so makes total sense! Stop trying to pick on WW for being well human being! 

So all and all this film show a different kind of super hero, who is so kind and will fight injustice. 
I cannot wait till my son is old enough to see this film! 


Wednesday, 7 June 2017

Coffee Break

So I fly alone today. Men folk are in the pool. 
I took my self for a coffee shop lunch. 

 

As I was browsing the sandwiches and what nots there is a Big Bang and tray on the floor with some coffee escaping everywhere. And one very embraced lady trying to give a quick tidy... 
so this got me thinking. Not only about the terrible staff that they didn't stop her and told her that's ok and to chill, but also why do we get so embarrassed and worked up about not being perfect.
What is perfect really? It is nice to strive for better and improvement, but why do we get so worked up. 
That lady told me it was her mumming instinct to tidy straight after... but why do we feel the need to make sure to be perfect and not be judged by others. 

So once again I just wish that everyone would be kinder and try not to judge each other. 
We all, well a majority of us, wants to be better than we are. But if and when we have these little failed moments wouldn't be just nice to be nice to ourselves? Think this would be a nice change in our mental state. 
Be nice to people around and yourself and go vote tomorrow! 

Thursday, 1 June 2017

Teasers and trailers

As you might already know I am a big fan of a superhero films. And I tend to gravitate towards Marvel but will give DC a chance. Actually very much looking forward to go see Wonder Woman next week. 

 

But film maker and promoters made me super angry of late...
Do you remember the trailer for Captain America Civil War when the casually put Spider man in the end? Or the X-Men Appocalipsis, when they got Logan scraping walls in the very end too? 
I get you need to get bums on sits and sell tickets and merch but with such well established franchises I honestly don't think these are necessary. Wouldn't it be a nice suprpise to see these guys when you are actually watching the film?! So annoyed. 
However there is another thing promo people do: out all the funny jokes into the trailer ... however irritating it is they make these comedies like 10 a year and some of them are pretty awful so I guess I can agree with untruthful representation of this kind of film in the trailer. 
So this brings me to Guardians of the Galaxy Vol2... 

 
like with any other marvel films I prefer not to know the story. Especially since I have never read the comic in my life so I was trying the avoid the trailer. Then hubby said there is a major plot spoiler in the trailer... and it's a massive film release. And I go to the cinema fairly regularly... gosh this game of avoiding all the trailers gets super hard and annoying. But I have managed.... just. Actually had to walk out as I got into the screen once. Looks like a right nutter! 
So I guess I would express the majority of cinema goers that spoilers in the trailers suck! And suck soooo much!! And please trailer makers, production companies, we will still go and see films, don't ruin the experience by giving away the plot twists and cameos in the trailers. Thank you!

Thursday, 25 May 2017

Parenting Anxiety

Did you know that there is everyone thinks they are experts? Well yeah we all seen these so called friends offering an advice on any subject... 
But did you know how much pressure there is from the society on parents? And the judgment. So freaking much!
I am also guilty of that, I am working on that though. 
However this isn't a post about this. This is a post about me freaking out about my spirited toddler who woke up today before 5am. 

 

Edgar is now 2 and 8 months old. He is a happy, active boy, with a very strong personality... 
We are the only people around with a kid.
I speak Russian to him, when I don't forget... 
So Egg interacts better with adults and really not fussed on other kids. And he doesn't talk. He finds his way to get stuff he wants directing us and we can understand him. It would be a nightmare if we didn't. 
Oh and I don't work and hubby works all the time to support us. Basically with him being a chef and it is very difficult to find a job that would fit around childcare... 

 
So... our nursery is a bit concerned about these issues with little Egg man. Our health visitor referred us to speech therapy... it's truly wonderful to have so many resources on NHS but since these are on NHS wait and  time scales are ridicules. To get a proper advice and comments from a therapist they want to see him in nursery. And the only time they can come in to see him  is July! Two months from now. And Edgar been referred as priority.... 

And all of this makes me angry and super worried. I am certain that the kid just doesn't want to talk and doesn't want to play with kids just yet coz the adults are more interesting. 
I was mainly with adults and played by myself, I turned out ok. 
I am also worried with all this professionals around him looking for something unsual they will find it. 

And then I blame my self... 
I blame my self for not taking all the time to him. I blame my self for speaking Russian and for speaking not enough Russian. I blame myself for not being able to find work and that's why kid doesn't have a lot of nursery time (read other kid interaction). I blame myself for not ignoring all the mummy's cliques at play groups and stop going. I blame myself for everything. 

Welcome to mumming world! It is amazing and wonderful and yet terrible and isolating.... 

Tuesday, 23 May 2017

Only love can...

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that" Martin Luther King Jr 

... I have no words... 

 

Sunday, 21 May 2017

Crazy Plant Obsession

I think I always had plants in my life... 
in the summer our balcony was like a little jungle back home. It was the only place that got sun all day long. 
So it wasn't a new scandi trend that I am into. 
However the love for plants didn't mean that I can pot, prune and put them in the right place... but it all has changed. Thanks to hubby dearest who is also rather greenfingered himself, he showed me how to plant, repot and what happens when he looses interest and forgets to water things... 
He doesn't water when I tend to overwater... no middle ground here. Oh and little one loves to water too.

 
We got a new succulent friend while food shopping yesterday. 

But luckily I have started to google and read on the plant subject so my green babies will thrive. 
I got to say our windowsill is super pretty 


I also learnt how to propagate some plants. It's actually easy and really satisfying. And then I give new plant babies away.
With warmer weather our garden is also looking rather  greener... but the mint! Who ever owned our house before planted the mint... without any way of limiting it. It's everywhere! I pulled some out of middle of patio in between the paving tiles. So my advice grow mint in a container! 

 
 Since the garden is still growing and not quiet finished there are only few photos of it. But this is the wonderful hydrangea we got from the flower show... 
Fun fact it was light blue when I brought it home. 

 

They change their colour depending of acidity in the soil. It has change the colour again... into more pinkish territory. 
Now I really want to clear the house of unwanted furniture and then hang some brackets up to hand flower pots of. It would be magical! 

 
 
Have a lovely weekend everyone! 
We are off to the Sunday market to see if I can score some more plants.
Sorry husband, I know I have promised not to get anymore... 

Sunday, 14 May 2017

My favourite shops

I love clothes and fashion... I love stuff and things makes me happy. I used to have so many shoes.... and some of them I haven't even worn before... and ever. 
I still have few shoes that I can't wear anymore since I had my son. My feet changed, just as much as my body did. I am still tiny size 2,5 to 3 (35-36 European) but now I also have wide feet. 

 

Yeap my feet got fat! And some of my old shoes are no good anymore. Damn! So I still fit into my wedding shoes? Will have to check this later. 
But as I got older I am trying to be more mindful of things I own. Sadly I would still get my things at cheap highstreet chains but I am getting less. I do not need tons of dresses and tees... 
I came to realise that I wear only certain things. If before I would wear dressed and would never wear shorts, now I mainly wear shorts, jeans and tees ... best gear to chase the toddler around. Now I am more conscious about my stuff to go with one another rather just be say a top that I can only wear with one thing.
But there are few exceptions to my new enlightened shopping way... 

Edgar... kid grows, ruins his clothes.

 

How cute is this hat?! And how cute is Egg in this hat. But it is straw. Like a delicate straw. So not for this energy ball!
Skin care... lotions, soaps.... I love these. 
Home... oh I love a nice stroll through a homeward department. 

 
Especially candels, such an easy way to transform your home. With dimmed flickering light and a scent. 
And my new obsession plants... 


Got this little guy at the RHS Flower Show. He has been repotted and has taken a proud spot on sunny windowsill in our bedroom... however I have promised  to hubby not to get anymore just yet.

This fast fashion culture we have it truly terrible. The waste, recycling, labour... have you seen that BBC Huw's war on waste from couple of years ago when he stood on the mountain of clothing? 
And think of these people who lost their lives in Bangladesh when the factory building collapsed... Here is a little Indi article on the subject...
I found this video on YouTube with great explanation of fast fashion.



But don't get me wrong, we cannot just shop ethically all the time. It is possible but not when I do not work personally, for example...  But do you really need new outfit every time you go out on the weekend? Or a brand new holiday wardrobe? So I am trying to shop more mindful if you like. Think before I buy... I have started to make a wish list every month of things I would like to have and goals I would like to achieve. And I go to say it really helps...