Sunday, 19 March 2017

Another Day Of Sun! La La Soundtrack

Have you seen La La Land? Well if you haven't you must have heard of it. And you heard all of that Oscar mishap and about the backlash against this wonderful picture. 
In my opinion some films have an important message or important sorry to tell like say Hidden Figures, and others tell a great sorry but without a deep meaning. And I think the La La was hat film. I mean it was about not giving up and have integrity but mainly it was about relationship of Mia and Sebastian. 


I think I didn't get warm fuzzing feelings about this movie due to crazy expectations I got after all the praise is the media... 
But then I have started listening to soundtrack... like all the time! It is glorious! Uplifting and makes me think happy thoughts. We even had a little dance off my with little one to Another Day Of Sun...
So basically I realised that I really enjoyed the film. Even if I didn't realise this straight away! It stays with you I guess...

Wednesday, 15 March 2017

Damn you changing room mirror ...

Most of the time I am happy with my little wobbly bits and silly shortness... and and tiny feet that changed a lot after having a child. Yes my feet are now wide but still 2,5 size UK. So it is extra hard to buy shoes!
I am growing to love myself. I had a little dance around in my underwear the other day thinking that it's not so bad. I got very into sport BC (Before Child) so even if my bits were not skinny, no tigh gap and not a very define waist... well I was happy with how I looked. I was strong!

Look how not big I am... not that I am big now but I was more confident I guess... 

As strength goes I am still very strong. I can very easily carry a wiggle over 15kg child around. I would break some sweat but I will be fine. 

I even came with terms that yes I am a bit bigger now but size is just a number after all and the highstreet shops can't decided on sizing between them so when I am size 10 in one shop in another I would be size 14! What's is this madness... well it's just a number. 
So yesterday I didn't sleep much again due to he offspring having a strange sleeping thing... but it was Monday. It is my only day to myself so I went to roam around high-street shops. Mama's hips and thighs are so in love with each other so they can't stop touching so I need new jeans and new denim shorts... 
So it was good and well ok maybe I have picked up he wrong size after all... but the mirror made me look very very big. I have checked in mirror at home, I was still the same size. Don't know what happened...I got upset. I did actually get a lovely pair of jeans on gap with out trying them on even. And for a tenner I thought I'm good and well and back to normal self.
I even slept longer today. Thank you kid. 
But suddenly... I just feel fat and unfit...
But fine I haven't been doing anything active but chasing the child around and walking with him.... 
Oh and the usual self doubt as a mother. 
So I feel crap! 
But the optimist in me has woke up and said... "D, you are silly! And you need a good sleep. For a month" amazing what lack of sleep does to you. 
I am also going to sing up for a race and get out there... this mama is happy when she runs!

Monday, 13 March 2017

International Women's Day. Two Ways

I grew up with 8th March always being a holiday. In Russia there is also the Men's day, technically it is for gents who served in armed forces, 23rd February. But until fairly recently only 8th March was a holiday, however the February holiday is now official thing too. Guess men felt too left out. 
Well if you are Russian or former USSR you are aware that on 8th of March you will be getting presents just for being a girl and having a vagina. No matter the age. It's a thing. And that would be pretty much it. 
Living abroad where the day is just a day... but I think either I have started paying attention or the feminism was in the air this year.
And here is everyone's favorite feminist...

Lots of ladies shared photos and stories about their inspiring girlfriends, actual real life examples of female awesomeness were all over social media. And of course some of my male friends asked the old time question "when is men day?" And I was pleased to see that a lot of people replayed that it is everyday! 
Yes calls to activism on 8th March are louder somehow. But I just really enjoyed the stories of these nightly ladies who made a difference one way or another. It was nice. And I m so ok not having this day celebrated like a Russian lady. Oh look you have a vagina have some flowers. I am not saying it is wrong, I was just happier in celebrating these awesome women and one day I hope to be one of these. 
While my friends from back home were sharing pics of their gorgeous flower or handmade cards from their kiddies here in UK I observed a more empowering message. 
I wonder if we can combine the two. Have some flowers for being a girl or identify yourself as a woman, but also look and read about these awesome chicks!

On the same note really want to get this book
To read it to my awesome rebel boy.... Feminism isn't just about women its about equality of everyone!

Saturday, 4 March 2017

Let us praise the strong women

And may we be them and may we raise them! 
I just have seen hidden figures. And what a treat of the film it is. I didn't know much of the actual story and frankly I didn't think much of it before. 
It was truly fascinating. Especially since my gran taught math and I hate math. 


The way these brilliant women been treated made me really sick and I also realise how privileged I am just of my slightly olive skin tone, I am still white. 
How stupid it is to judge some one by they skin colour.  And as Janel Monae character put it it is something you cannot change! With all that strong will and super sass she is definitely my favourite heroine from this film. We just should be 1st! 
I also truly loved Octavia Spencer character's determination to keep her girls working. When did we as women began to be so mean to each other. We should support each other and fight for each other. There are still plenty walls and ceilings for us to break down, we need to work together... not tear each other down. 


Since I am not in the real world at this very moment I am blissfully unaware of workplace judgments bein a stay at home mother... I truly hope that we as women can be supportive. But I know not everyone as enlightened as me. 
One of my school friends lives for French language so teaches her little one already. Little flower is younger than my son but she has to battle every week with this question but why do you do this and being judged. I did try to tell her to ignore but as we know it is harder said than done. 
The other day two mothers with little kids watched me fight with my spirited toddler over a jacket, I could see the resentment and judgment. I didn't want to say that they will have this to come I wish they kids would be obedient and lovely... I am sure they will understand very soon what is what. 
But for now I will be brave, hard working, and will try my best to raise my son feminists. 

Monday, 27 February 2017

Visions of Red and Black. Oscars 2017

Oh all the right people won. Even despite that awkward moment we all be talking for years to come... Here is the outfits that made me really happy. And predominantly these are red and black. 

Can I please have the Viola Davies' cold shoulder number? 

Now that's a movie star Taraji P Henson!

Here are some honorable mentions that don't fall into my red and black obsession.

Golden girl Emma Stone like female Oscar 

Halle Berry's natural hair is a thing of beauty

 Oh Naomie Harris is super beautiful in this white structure galore with pretties asymmetric shoes. 

Oh and Hailee Steinfeld dressed like in a beautiful cloud of light fabric.... Just aww!

As for gentlemen it is of course the smart cut tailoring. I truly loved Riz Ahmed 

Or maybe it is because every time I see him I think of his character in Rogue One after he send the message to rebels... Heart breaks!!

And this... 

Pretty sure it is like a rule of Oscars, when in doubt bring your mama! 
I just cannot bring myself to watch Lion just yet. It is different viewing of sad film involving small kids when you become a parent. 
But I am off to see Moonlight tonight. Very excited about that! 

Tuesday, 21 February 2017


People come and go.. we change we are busy we priorities.... my little monkey comes first so I don't have time for anyone but him. Well you all can cook and wipe your own butts. 
Yes being a mother is amazing... but it is also super hard demanding and isolating. If you have one mum friend cosider yourself lucky. I have them but hey aren't near! I love you mamas but you aren't in arms reach. And you have mamas within 2 or 3 doors to you.. you are so lucky!! 

(I love Rhian hat much that even let her snapchat filer me!)

I thought I had that friend thing figured out... oh boy was I wrong. My freaking maid of honour turned out to be someone else. Not someone I want to maintain relationship with... it is hard to make friends when you are older... but some how I have couple of people I am fond of! And we don't need to talk all the time...  
Actually had some homemade cake and good company and a nice chat and sushi and secco later in a week... and I had my old friend over for silly film and wine a week before... feels nice to have people in your life who don't need their bums whipped by you...

Love you bitches we need to hang more! 


Monday, 20 February 2017

Learning to sit down...

I guess we all know what Pinterest is. That magical place that shows you what you can do, what you can have... they actually have some great activities boards for little ones. 
Then we have instamums ... these pretty women with their immaculately dressed kids posing for photos... Or these kids that actually sit down to do stuff and they don't run around... 
Well part of me know it is all a lie. And they, instamums, say them self do not trust the pictures. My old school friend posted the awesome crafting photo with her two year old boy. I was in aww, he just sat there and painted the cut up egg carton.... my Egg would have spill stuff everywhere and wouldn't paint so delicately for a two year old. So my friend replies do not believe the picture before this was taken her little boy had to be cleaned off the paint and was running around like a mad loony... so there we have it do not believe the picture. 
And as we all know behind a good instargam there is someone who is actually taking this photo for that person... I mainly get selfies with my kid. Do you?
All children are different. And in a way I am sort of jealous of these calm munchkins who want to sit and play quietly. I just went to the kitchen to get more coffee I was gone maybe 5 mins... Egg pulled all he sofa cushions down moved his table in the middle of the room and turned off the internet. So thinking of him sitting down and doing something quietly was... I didn't think it would be possible 


Admittedly this didn't last long. But now I know that I can get him to do something quietly for about 15 minutes. But under the supervision... about 10 mins after this been taken Egg learned to squish these beads and started throwing them around. 


I do not think there's such thing as prefect parents... we are all great in our own way. 
My kid is spirited and very strong willed but I knew that for a while. We both are learning to manage this lovely family trait. Think if he will sit down more regularly for a quiet activity he might in the end lean to be patient. 
I am doing the best I can. I do not feel guilty about sticking him in front of the telly. We all need a bit of peace... chances are he won't be watching it as such but looking for more mischief to accomplish.